Funny Rap Lyrics: 20 Original, Clean Bars About Everyday Life

The short answer: the funniest rap lyrics take something everybody knows (a dying phone battery, a diet that lasts ten minutes, a group chat nobody reads) and rap it like it is the most important thing in the world. Below are 20 original, clean bars you can use, sorted by topic.

Funny rap lyrics about phones and tech

My battery's at two and I'm lost in the street, my phone and my dignity, both in retreat.

I typed "be there soon" and it sent "bees are spoon", now my mom's on her way with a jar and a broom.

The Wi-Fi's so weak that my video's a slide, I've been buffering here since the third of July.

I've got four hundred tabs and I can't find the one, my laptop is wheezing, the fan's on the run.

Funny rap lyrics about food

I meal-prepped on Sunday, five boxes in line, by Monday at lunch I'd already ate nine.

I said "just one chip" with my hand on the bag, now the bag's in the bin and I'm hiding the tag.

I went in for milk, came out with a grill, a lamp and a plant, but I'm missing the milk still.

Three coffees deep and I'm vibrating loud, I can hear colors, I'm floating on clouds.

Funny rap lyrics about work and school

This meeting's a text that went way out of hand, two hours of slides that I don't understand.

I'm the group project hero, I did every page, they brought a highlighter, and they want equal wage.

My boss said "quick call", that's a lie and a half, I've aged in this chair, I've grown a new calf.

I'm "per my last email" in human form, polite on the outside, inside it's a storm.

Funny rap lyrics about pets

My cat pays no rent but she runs the whole house, she ignores me all day, then she brings me a mouse.

My dog's got a schedule, he barks at the mail, every day like it's breaking news, without fail.

I bought him a bed for a hundred and ten, he sleeps in the box, so I'm broke once again.

Funny rap lyrics about getting older

I stood up too fast and my knee made a sound, like a bag full of popcorn that fell on the ground.

I said "kids these days" and I heard my own dad, the scariest bar that I've ever had.

I'm in bed by nine and I call that a win, my wild night out is a nap and a hymn.

Funny back-and-forth rap lyrics for two people

A duo rap gets funnier when the second line answers the first. One line each:

A: I'm the brains of this duo, I planned the whole day, B: you planned it so well that we're lost on the way.

A: I cooked us a dinner, a five-star affair, B: the smoke alarm clapped, so at least someone cared.

How do you write a funny rap?

1. Pick something small and universal. Laundry beats politics.
2. Rap it like it is epic. The more serious the delivery, the funnier the subject.
3. Land the joke on the last word. Set it up in line one, rhyme the punchline at the end of line two.
4. Add one real detail. "Forty-two items and no bread" is funnier than "I bought too much".

How do I make a funny rap video with a friend?

Want a funny rap video of you and a friend? On airapvideo you upload one photo of each of you and click Create. You get a 10-second vertical video of the two of you rapping on one stage, with a built-in beat and vocals, in about 3 to 5 minutes. You cannot type your own lyrics into the video, so use one of the bars above as the caption and let the clip carry the energy.

Make a funny duo video, or go further with rap battle roasts for a friend.